Tuesday, 11 April 2017

Life as it is, Precious.

My little honey bunny has been hospitalised. Again, in her young life, and she's not even 2. Fighting high fever, her little episodes of muscle spasms got me a little too worried that we decided to bring her to A&E. Thankfully it is not seizures. Doctor says there are too many white blood cells in her blood. She has viral infection. Little cherub hasn't had any milk the past 2 days and very little food. Drip was the way to prevent dehydration, but medication was a nightmare. Everytime nurses or doctors came in she would cry like someone was going to beat her up.

4th night here, and I am thankful for all the nurses and all our friends who prayed for Phoebe and our little family. A little together, makes a lot. And the support gives us strength. Thankful that her fever has subsided, just a little more.. Have more food and then you will be good to go home babydoll.

Few nights here got me thinking. As parents we are readily available to catch a grenade for our children. We love them unconditionally. We can sacrifice many things for them, and we'll always gladly do so. One day, I was watching TV, a channel 8 show and an actress in the show said something like ' why are we always so ready to give all our time and sacrifices for our descendants but we are not willing to give as much to our parents? ' This got me thinking. As a mom, I know that my mother would do the same for me, as what I did for my princess, but how come love is different for our own parents? I do love my mom, needless to say, but I've seen much in life, my mom always says that a mother can raise 10 children, but when she is old, 10 children cannot take care of 1 mother. I thought about my grandmother. She raised 10.. But among the 10.. Not everyone is willing to care for the old, frail woman who has dementia.. Have they all forgotten the tough times she went through, working long hours everyday, to bring food home and to send them to school? My grandmother was a tough woman, she raised all 10, all by herself. Yet not all children are willing to take care of her now..

Whatever happened to ''mama I will always love you?" It is heartbreaking to see how children can forget a mom's love for them and not feel any guilt or responsibility over their own mother. Sometimes we think.. How can people be so heartless? Regardless, I am thankful. My mom is thankful, (my grandmother highly prefers to stay with her son), that I have a filial Uncle and aunt who are willing to take care of my grandmother. I salute my cousins who tirelessly change my grandmother's pampers everyday, bathe her, feed her and to simply be there for her. To the unsung heroes of the family, I thank you all for giving your unconditional love to granny, even though she is like a child now, throwing tantrums and being difficult sometimes.. You guys are truly amazing. In the midst of doubting humanity, there is heart. There is still unconditional love for parents, as much as there is for our children and descendants.

Let's all be human.

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always, 
As long as I'm living, 
My baby you'll be... 

I'll love you forever, 
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living, 
My Mommy you'll be... 

(Song taken from book- Love you forever)

Faithfully penned by 
Connie Soh-Sie

Friday, 25 November 2016

Insights from the Asia Parenting Conference 2016 and my personal side note

Took me a few rounds around downloading several apps, trying out different avenues to finally settle with blogger.com. I'm a new mom, sort of, to a perfect human being named Phoebe (of cos she's perfect- I made her, you see).

Sometimes I have random thoughts, or things I would like to share as a mom, and as an early childhood educator. I have been in this field for the past 6 years, going on 7. The joy from growing with the children is impeccable and fulfilling (definitely blood- boiling at times), but mostly the good stuff.

This morning kel and I went for the Asia Parenting Conference 2016, he signed us up and we got up early in the morning to attend this seminar and let me tell you this- the key to learning, to even absorb and find something useful is to enter with an open mind, and to throw away the assumption that you know everything. Well, I don't, neither do an educator who has been teaching for the last 30 years, they don't. There is always something to learn, be it from good practices or not-so-ideal practices. Always be open to new knowledge.

These are some of the nuggets I took away from the conference:

> Speaker Edwin Choy (Parents as coaches)

How you treat your child, how you see your child will translate to their self worth, to how they see themselves. The importance of self worth is in preparing them for the future to learn how to fend for themselves. You will be doing an injustice to them by doing and deciding everything for them, so much so that they do not know how to cope when they meet with adversities.
Father figures are very important to the family dynamics and how the child will turn out to be, Dr. Choy's research has shown that most children with poorer emotional health and behavioural issues, part of the reason is due to the absence of the father figure in their lives.

How we raise our children, will be the change we want to see in the world, as you are directly impacting your children's children, by your parenting styles.

Refrain from valuing our children based on performance, as this sends them a message that their self worth is based on how well they perform, be it academically or in certain skills. They need to know that it is okay to fail, treat failure as feedback, learn from it, try again and they will learn to grow up as resilient beings who believe that their learning has no limitations but only possibilities.


> Speaker YY Low (Nutrition and Psychology)

Vitamin B12: Cognitive and brain function (not produced by our body)
Vitamin D3: Produced by our body under sunlight **hence see in relation the benefits of exposing our children to outdoor activities.
DHA: (Omega 3 oil) not produced by our body, essential for brain functioning- cell growth and neurotransmission
Carnosine: only from meat, enhances mood, prevents overeating

Found in meat, fish and eggs..., therefore it is not advisable for young children to be restricted to a vegetarian or vegan diet as they will not be able to benefit from the vitamins they can absorb from meat, fish and eggs that cannot be produced by their bodies, thus affecting their cognitive development.

Always start the first 10 minutes and last 10 minutes of your child's day with positivity (be it with words like I Love You, or a big hug)! Your positivity as a parent will directly affect your child's emotional health and mood as you are the first point of contact every first 10 minutes upon waking up and the last 10 minutes before they fall asleep.


> Speaker Dr Ng Meng Lek

Children with poor observation skills will tend to take a longer time to recognise the difference in alphabets and characters, thus affecting their comprehension skills when they grow older. Introduce games like spot the difference to engage their observation skills through play so that they can spot the difference in symbols and words eg. 大太, o and a, hence increasing reading speed.

It is important to teach children how to learn, learn the concept, and know how to apply in different situation, instead of teaching heavy content. Teach a child how to learn, and they can learn anything.
For example, if you master the concept on how to learn language, you can learn countless languages.

Teach your child the right values and they will have a strong value system for life.


While putting Phoebe to sleep, my mind just came up with this short poem.
Random, but I guess it is reinforced from the nuggets that I have received today.

Roses are red, 
Violets are blue. 
When you love your children, 
They learn to love too. 

Faithfully penned by
Connie Soh-Sie 

P.S: Please pardon the alignment of this post as this is all typed in from iphone6. Enjoy!